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Planning for the Sad Truth of Growing Old Together

If you’re part of a married couple, it’s highly likely that one of you will become a widow or widower at some point.

If it’s any comfort, there are now some 20 million widows and widowers in America, according to a study from Merrill Lynch and Age Wave that focuses on widowhood, as reported by CBS News’ Moneywatch in “A retirement planning must-do for married couples.” The study, “Widowhood: The Loss Couples Rarely Plan for—and Should” takes a detailed look at what happens, when the first spouse dies.

It should be noted that women are three times as likely as men to be the surviving spouse, since women historically tend to live longer. Widowers tend to marry younger women, leaving many older women to need to learn how to live as senior singles.

More than half of all of those surveyed who had lost a spouse, said they had not planned for it.  More than three-quarters of married retirees said they would not be financially prepared for retirement, if their spouse passed away.

Losing a spouse is the hardest thing for married people, particularly if they have never been single. Some 75% of those who had lost a spouse, said it was the single hardest thing they’d ever had to deal with. Half of them experience a household decline in income of 50%—or more. Adjusting to that loss of income is a big concern. 

When the first spouse passes, the surviving spouses report that they were overwhelmed with paperwork and didn’t know how to begin.

You can plan for this unpleasant eventuality, and you should. Just as having an estate plan in place will help loved ones, planning for one of you to become widowed will help the other. 

What should couples do in advance?

  • Know what all your assets and accounts are and how to access all accounts.
  • Make sure both names are on all accounts and deeds.
  • Be able to access cash.
  • Keep credit card debt separate.

Here’s some advice from the surviving spouses:

  • Avoid making big decisions, until at least a year has passed.
  • Find all important documents and pay bills on time.
  • Notify banks, financial advisors and employers.
  • Reevaluate your retirement strategy, following a financial audit of your new situation.
  • Update your estate plan and check all beneficiary designations.

Losing a spouse is a difficult and painful experience.  However, many people report that afterwards they found courage and strength they never knew they had and are living a full and rewarding life.

Reference: CBS Moneywatch (Sep. 12, 2018) “A retirement planning must-do for married couples”

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